Students wrote love letters and posted them around the library.
Dear Mature, Good-looking, Virginia Freshman!
It seems that you were carried to us, on a white heavenly cloud from the rolling hills of Virginia. Your strapping physique is intoxicating with gorgeous blonde locks that lay with perfection with which only gods can compete. You smell of freshly laundered garments, with the musky aroma of Appalachian adventure. Your Cash for Clunkers presentation was more like Cash for HUNKers!
We want to soak you.
With great love and desire,
Your backseat buddies!